Live it

I'm eating a digestive biscuit as I type this. 

I can feel my stomach expanding with the food I inhale in. 

But let's get things right- I am not a mugger. 

I try to do things because people tell me I have to do it. Because everyone is doing it too and I need to do it. I do things because I do not want people to be dissappointed in me and so my actions will not shatter what's left of their hopes of me. 

They hope I will be rich and I will own a mansion with a big swimming pool and be a banker. They hope I will score A1 for my exams and be the best student in class so they can tell it to their friends. 

I want to help people, I want them to be proud of me, see the shining light in their eyes and marvel at the things I can do and I can achieve. I want to see me as who I am, and not who they think I should be. 

I want to be a happy person who has a life to live, who has time to take snapshots of the little things in life, to spend the day tottering in the kitchen, delivering food to people and seeing the smile on their faces. 

I want to sit on a swing, a good book in hand, with a cup of tea, watching the children around me playing at the playground and building sandcastles. 

I don't need to travel the world. I don't need to be a doctor. I don't need to have a PhD. I don't need to be rich to be happy. 

I can be an average Singaporean living in an ordinary HDB flat living in the heartlands of Singapore and doing the things I love with the people I love. I can be a happy person with the little that I have. 

I don't have to listen to what people tell me to do everyday. I can be what I am and who I want to be and nobody can decide that for me. I can fail this test and still be happy 20 years down the road because failing my chemistry exam will not determine whether I will still be reading a good book sitting at the swing and drinking tea while watching children play. Scoring a C5 for my exam will not determine    how much time I can spend in the kitchen 5 years later when I'm in university. I can still be happy and I can still be who I am. 

Don't make the years of your life something you would not want to be doing. If you are mugging, stop and look at the people you have in your life and take the time to do what really defines who you are- not as a student, but as a human. A human who has a life to live. 

Live it. With no regrets. 

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